Any other podcast addicts out there?
I was really excited when I heard from Rachel at Maker Style a few weeks ago. Her podcast was new to me, but sounded right up my alley. I am absolutely honoured to be the first interview for her Bra Making Month. If you are into sewing, and particularly lingerie making, this series is going to be a must-listen.
You can listen to my interview HERE.
After doing my interview with Rachel those few weeks back, I realized how much my anxiety has improved. I feel like I’ve got a brand new start, but at the same time have this nagging sense of regret about the things I’ve missed out on because of my anxiety. I was able to speak to Rachel openly, and when we went our separate ways, I didn’t analyze every word I had said, second guessing my wording or phrasing and content. I can’t express to you how good this feels.
I’m still struggling with things – particularly fears about Isabel’s well being and my overall sense of self-worth, most notably being my body image. I think these are going to be things I struggle with forever. But, I’ve really found that saying my fears out loud (to people who are supportive) and being open with all of you here has helped (in addition to medication under the guidance of a supportive family physician, and therapist). The things that have changed the most for me are the fact that I now sleep. I have a sleepless night here or there, but not weeks straight of insomnia. I also can sit and play with Isabel, or sew, or watch tv without my brain spinning off uncontrollably in a million different directions.
I hate calling it anxiety. It sound so… stupid. Everyone has anxiety and it actually serves a helpful purpose. What I have is out of control, spinning, tornado fear-for-my-life catastrophic brain-chaos. I just don’t have a proper word for it. So, for now “anxiety” will have to do.